Friday, January 16, 2015

A1A Marathon

Run - 52:13 - 6.83 miles -  7:38 per mile pace - 136 avg HR
Ran  a little shorter and a lot better today than last night. I will start coming around.
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Well I did it, I signed up for my second race of 2015. The A1A Marathon. I ran it last year (3:23:04 - 4th AG - and Boston qualified). Even though it was more than 30 minutes slower than my all time fastest marathon, it was my fastest post-traumatic brain injury marathon by a lot. I do not know if I am or will be marathon ready for this race because I do not have a lot of prep time, but my general fitness and my running pace has improved. I will need to squeeze a few longer runs in over the next few weeks and hope that I can run this race on guts. Whatever, if I just remind myself that it is a long supported training day, I should be fine. -
Thursday
Run - 1:15:00 - 8.2 miles -  9:09 per mile pace - 119 avg HR
Fort Lauderdale Road Runners run club. I had nothing tonight. Luckily, I started early to avoid running with the fast group (like last weeks sub 7 min per mile pace), and ran a little further than what I had intended; but slow.
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Picked Mimi up from the airport - she has been working in Jacksonville for a few days. Randy's training is going spectacularly - He heals great, sit, stays, lay downs, catches treats off his nose, and today, learned how to shake. I love the munchkin. 

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Run - 1:01:00 - 7.47 miles -  8:09 per mile pace -129 avg. HR
I Felt sluggish today; the wind made it even less enjoyable today
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Joy Division - Leave Me Alone
I have been obsessed (again) with Joy Division. I suppose I have come full circle musically; as the late Ian Curtis and his mates made such a profound impact upon my developing music tastes earlier in my life.


  1. Isolation
    Song by Joy Division
  2. In fear every day, every evening,
    He calls her aloud from above,
    Carefully watched for a reason,
    Painstaking devotion and love,
    Surrendered to self preservation,
    From others who care for themselves.
    A blindness that touches perfection,
    But hurts just like anything else.
    Isolation, isolation, isolation.
    Mother I tried please believe me,
    I'm doing the best that I can.
    I'm ashamed of the things I've been put through,
    I'm ashamed of the person I am.
    Isolation, isolation, isolation.
    But if you could just see the beauty,
    These things I could never describe,
    These pleasures a wayward distraction,
    This is my one lucky prize.
    Isolation, isolation, isolation

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Back on the attack!

Ah, so I let myself recover yesterday and wisely took the day off. Mimi left 3 Sam Adams beers in the refrigerator - even though I don't like craft beers - she is away, so I consumed them for her. Now I am trying to figure out what to do constructively today. It remains to be seen what will become of the day (but one thing is certain, I do know how to find trouble), GO, GO, GO!
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Run - 1:00:08 - 7.66 miles - 7:51 pace per mile - 132 avg HR
Still feeling Sunday's race, but I am sure yesterdays day off was a good call. Today I just ran free to get the legs moving. I can feel the residual junk in my legs, but I'm glad that I got re-started.
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The devil in me is really referring to the child molesters, murderers, and countless others in our prison system who begin a relationship with god while in the joint... These chameleons believe that the big guy has forgiven their sins (sins which he knew they would commit all along), and after the electric chair, natural death or whatever, they will float in the clouds among harp plucking angels. Whilst those who grew up believing in a different god or none at all, will burn in a fiery pit. This is laughable at best and perhaps during a simpler time fantasies like heaven and hell kept the masses in line. But seriously, it is time for Americans (other nations are as primitive, but not at the same rate) to EVOLVE. Further, the advertised reward of heaven is repulsive anyway. Floating around worshiping some ego obsessed torturous dude who is so insecure that he commands that you bow to him even though he isn't worthy. More on why he isn't worthy soon. In the meantime, love everyone. Be like that other fictional guy, Jesus, and feed the hungry and clothe the poor. Really.

Monday, January 12, 2015

Feeling lazy today

Well, I need to get it going today but my start has been slow. My mind is tired and it is telling me that my legs should be tired too. They are not, but I can't get started. I think I will take randy for a walk and then have some lunch, relax and change my watch. Generally when the dive watch comes off and the Garmin goes on, my tee, shorts and shoes follow and I am out the door. Randy? I better go wake him up.
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Well, I just got back from taking Mimi too the airport - bye-bye-baby... and I am going to rest my running sticks today. After last months over-use injury, I am going to train smartish.  I am from the school of more is better but when you miss multiple days due to an injury, its time to think. Thinking is hard.

Sunday, January 11, 2015

River, Roots and Ruts - 13.1 Mile Trail Race


Run - Trail race - 15th place/1st in age group today
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1:39:11 - 13.10 miles - 07:34 per mile pace (hills, dirt, hills, man-mad obstructions and mud)
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I went out fast and then maintained in today's race. A few miles after mile 8 I made a wrong turn and  ran a 1/4 mile out of my way. A kind runner who I had recently passed gave me the heads up (otherwise I would have kept going in the wrong direction); I turned around and followed him through the next 3 miles - the hilly and technical section - until about mile 12 and the finish was certain. I know I said to him, "come on, let's bring this home" - but he didn't respond as I picked up the pace considerably. I finished strong and was very happy to drop about 10 minutes off last years time at this race. Actually, I was surprised to learn that I finished in 15th place overall and 1st in my age-group. It has been a long time since I have ran so competitively and it felt really good. 
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Sunday, January 4, 2015

THE HOWLER Jan 4 - 10

Welcome to my room of twisted ramblings, recovery from a traumatic brain injury, athletic training, vegan munchies, music sensations and social howls.
today 
1/10
Run - 31:09 - 4.06 miles - 7:29 per mile pace - 137 avg HR
Racing a trail 1/2 marathon tomorrow so this was a short run with some tempos thrown in.
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Not much on tap athletically today. Perhaps a quick run with short tempo bursts to get the legs firing before tomorrows trail race in Alva, River, Roots & Ruts 13.1 mile trail race. I don't know where I am at physically so this will be a good test. I certainly am not looking forward to the 2 hour car drive to Alva today. Fra, Mimi's uncle is coming and running the 5k race - he is 76 and preparing for the Vermont Half Marathon in May (which he finished last year). Fra is a kick ass old man and I really do enjoy his company. 

1/9
Run - 1:14:00 - 9.13 miles - 8:06 per mile pace - 125 avg HR

easy steady run in my new light weight sneakers (Asics Gel-exce 33). I moved up a 1/2 size to attempt to save my my feet from continued black toenails.




1/8
Run - 38:10 - 5.46 miles - 6:59 pace per mile - 149 avg heart rate
Greater Fort Lauderdale Road Runner Club group run. I went out with the fast guys. I hung with them (barely); but one of my better runs since the brain injury! I am so happy. I hope this improvement continues - I will sleep well and dream tonight.


1/7
Run - 1:00:07 - 7.83 miles - 7:40 pace per mile - 128 avg heart rate
Good run with some tempo. I never really pushed it; instead just a consistent stride.
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As a long-time fan of both Joy Division and New Order, I am very excited to have tickets to see original member of both bands, Peter Hook, perform a special tribute concert with his current band: Peter Hook and the Light. The show isn't until May, so I wait in eager anticipation.


1/6
Tempo run in town: 1:02:00 - 8.2 miles - 7.33 per mile pace - 146 avg hr
Best run since before last months groin injury. steady pace

1/5
Two solid runs before 9 am yesterday totaling 17.5 miles. The first one was an early morning street run in the dark (I need to try to do that more frequently) and the second was a trail run with hills at Vista View. 
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Then we drove to Orlando to have lunch with my estranged family. I was torn deeply about this; however it ended up being quite nice. I connected with my brother who is very cool. Don and my mother turned out to be moved - as was I - by the meeting. I was nice. But true to form I didn't sugar-coat my feelings and I did communicate related details to each of them. They both were hurt and shed tears - especially my mother. Thankfully, Mimi was there to help my her internalize the definition of my words. Really, I was as gentle as a mouse, but I probably towered like a giant rat. So it goes...
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Easy jog - 1:03:00 - 7.58 miles - 8:18 m/p mile pace - 132 Avg HR

   1/4
It is 1:24 am - and yes, I am up early again. I slept fine but I had to pee so falling asleep again is unlikely, at least immediately. And my head is spinning, complicating my effort to sleep. I need to get up and out for a run early this morning. No f-cking around. I have started the year off poorly with only one run in the first three days of 2015. It is essential to get my training going again as I aspire to ascend from the land of the brain damaged to the realm of the athlete. Also I do not have much time either, as Mimi and I are driving to Orlando today - a 3 hour drive. So most of my day will be in the car. 

I have mixed emotions. I am meeting my half-brother, Leonard (who I am excited to see) and my mother (who I do not know or respect) for lunch today. I do not want to get too personal but my childhood was a fearful time exacerbated by a tortuous stepfather (Don - Leonard's father); who was enabled by my mother, Lois (I will refer to her forward as Lois). I will not detail the horror of my childhood here. Let me just say that I cringe revisiting the memories and I will spare my readers from my the unpleasant gore. I haven't seen Leonard in over 20 years and my mother in at least that long. I know that she visited me at Craig/Swedish hospitals in Inglewood, CO - but I was in a coma so I guess that I didn't mind. Lois began calling me early in my recovery once I was awake and became aware. Conversation was difficult at best and my discomfort was palpable so I stopped taking her phone calls. Yes, I am a cold bastard for sure.


As I said, My brother will be there and this pleases me. I probably wouldn't be having this meeting otherwise. Also my daughter, Nico, is the facilitator of this dance. My daughter is in contact with my mother and she thinks the little old lady is 'cute' and arranged this entire thing. For Nico, I will endure. On one hand, Lois is getting older and it is cruel of me to entirely cut her out of my life. On the other hand, I haven't resolved my anger, resentment and unlike of her. So I will go and eat pizza and drink a beer or two with Leonard, Lois and Mimi (Thank Santa Mimi is coming along too), and be pleasant-like. With Mimi in tow, I will guard my words and smother the bitter with honey. I will be nice.

Did I mention that I need to get out the door and get my run on? It is the dark of night here in SoFla although I do have a headlamp. Maybe I will get going early this morning - I have some thinking to do. One thing for sure, when I am running I think more clearly than I typically do. Okay, I shall rise and do this. This rant will go to rest for now, check back later for an update (or not). Peace and love, Dick Dime

- It is 3:24 am now - and yes I ran in the early morning dark. It was quite nice, actually. I may start doing that more often.
- Run - 1:07:00  - 8.21 miles - 8:09 per mile pace - 133 avg HR

- Run 2 - 1:30:00 - 9.38 miles - 9:36 per mile pace - 136 avg Hr
It feels good to get in 2 runs (17.45 miles) before 9:15 

Sunday, December 28, 2014

THE HOWLER DEC 28 - JAN 3

Welcome to my room of twisted ramblings, recovery from a traumatic brain injury, athletic training, vegan munchies, music sensations and social howls.
today 
1/3
I wake up early. I usually wake up by 4am and today is no different. I do not know if it is because of my traumatic brain injury or not. It is hard to tell because before my accident I managed a bar and didn't leave until 3:30 in the morning. I slept until 8 or 9 in the morning - like a rock. I rarely woke up before 8am (sometimes an hour or two later). Now, I tend to go to bed early - by 9pm or so; and by 3am I am restless. It is frustrating. So here I am, on my blog typing gibberish, haunting my favorite social networks, etc. This is what I do.  
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Well, I just don't feel right. Another day off. I'm not one to rest a lot, but I'm trying to train smarter than how I typically do. I thought I should force a run; even a shorty, but I know me... once I start, it is on. So, instead I will rest up and see if I am up to snuff tomorrow.


1/2

Run - 1:07:00 - 8.36 miles - 8:00 p/m pace - 135 avg HR
1st run of the year; steady pace

1/1

I am at war
I am looking back a lot lately. The past few years have been an amazing journey as I learn and adapt to living as a challenged traumatic brain injury survivor. Every single day I am tested - both physically and mentally. The seemingly most simple tasks, are complicated. Sometimes I manage a 'work-a-round' until a solution is found. Other times I get into deeper trouble. Sometimes I get lost, sometimes I get hurt - but always I move forward. I am resilient to say the least. I am determined to find the man that I remember (and was). I work extremely hard trying to regain lost physical and mental abilities, and despite constant disappointments, I do not surrender. I am literally at war and I am determined to win. As most of you know, running is important to me. Pre TBI I enjoyed athletic success. Post TBI I again enjoy athletic success. Perhaps the scale has changed, reluctantly, I acknowledge this - but reluctantly is generous. I guess the honest truth is I do not acknowledge 'the new me', I battle the new me. I do not want to grade my performances on a scale. As aforementioned, I am at war and it rages.
Did I say that I am looking forward a lot lately? Well, I am and the future glows. I am winning. I have a team and together anything is possible. With that, thanks for listening, understanding and tolerating this boast. Over the past 3 years I have logged 6700 miles of running. I am proud of this and I never ran that much in my faster life. I will try, but most likely I will never be as fast as I was. Not only do I live with a traumatic brain injury, I am 5 months shy of the big 50.
Forward, March!


12/31
Be safe out there tonight.
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Run - 1:48:00 - 12.91 miles - 1:48:00 - 8:21 per mile pace - 137 avg hr
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I ran a little further today; just enough to log my 2600th mile running for the year. A new record. On the 31st of December last year I ran my 2000th mile. At the time the most I had ever logged in a year (even before my accident). In spite of logging over 7500 miles over the past 3 years, I am still not even close to the runner that I had been before. Yeah, it doesn't matter. As much as I long for the guy I remember, I am pretty stoked about my consistency and dedication. I will keep at it.


12/30

I just don't have any motivation... I have been laying in bed with the puppy for hours. I guess my run is going to not happen today.

12/29
Run - 1:08:00 - 7.7 miles - 7:49 per mile pace - 130 avg hr
A very sluggish jog. I just felt off today.

12/28
Run - 50:00 - 6.27 miles - 7.58 per mile pace - 142 avg hr
I was a little tired and I only had time for a shortish run before football Sunday. Hot today.

12/29